There’s been a lot of discussion lately in the Bloggernacle about feeling out of place at church, feeling you don’t measure up to the “ideal.” Some have suggested the church should stop emphasizing the ideal in its teachings as strongly as it has. I’ve struggled with this feeling all my life.

I love the gospel, and I love going to church. But what if, like me, you don’t have children yet? (more…)

It’s nearly a mile to the nearest house next to mine and I’m not used to hearing knocks on my door. When I heard my neighbor knock I almost hit the ceiling. I thought about hiding, but I saw it was him, so I felt safe coming to the door. (more…)

First a few words about myself. I’m an only child, although my mom’s two Maltese dogs probably qualify as half-brothers. I did pretty normal things growing up—played hours of King’s Quest IV, went to Cotillion, got paid for getting good grades, and spent summers with my grandparents in Pennsylvania—and my parents never worried about me. Until I asked a Mormon girl to prom. (more…)

Not of the Savior, that is. I wish I could say not of me, Aaron. I am sad to see that on my very first thread things got a little heated.

We’re all brethren here. (Oh and for Miranda, sisters too.) We need to stay cloaked in charity like a mantle. Like my mom always said to her rough housing sons, it’s all fun and games until someone gets hurt. When speaking about something close to my heart I speak too bluntly. I don’t have Pres. Hinckley’s talent for being soft spoken and diplomatic.
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I’ve got a bone to pick with the paper industry. On a personal level, it’s my husband’s career; he took a job in the Potlatch toilet paper plant instead of going to law school. But that’s a separate issue.

Paper destroys our environment, and I’m not talking about trees either. Paper production releases millions of pounds of known toxins. Let me fill you in on a few of these. (more…)

DVD Review: The Legend of Johnny Lingo

It’s been two years since The Legend of Johnny Lingo came to theaters, and I never managed to see it until recently. It wasn’t that I was avoiding it; I actually liked the original 1969 movie a great deal and wondered how this movie would tie in. (more…)

Cast:
Adam (roommate)—studious and most likely to become rich
Seth (roommate)—engaged, with a tendency to swear
Nephi (roommate)—likes to remind people that he’s the ward mission leader
Abe (roommate)—the ladies find his rippling biceps irresistible
Me (Greg)—lapsed Quaker
Melanie—fiancé, dedicated to stopping Seth’s swearing habit
Floyd—eats everyone’s food and always leaves after midnight

Acknowledgments: I’d like to thank my new roommate for writing this for me. Maybe I’ll write my own post next week. (more…)

At church on Sunday we sang, “I Stand All Amazed” for the sacrament hymn. I’m the type that mumbles through hymns and mostly just listens. Immediately behind me a voice rang out, singing beautifully with grace and enthusiasm. I wondered to myself who the singer could be until I was able to steal a momentary glance at its source. Much to my surprise, it was one of the MIA Maids in the ward. I remember when I used to sing like that. (more…)

I can admit it: I love fast Sunday. The idea of sacrifice, of laying those two meals on the altar and making covenants with our Heavenly Father—it is my favorite time of worship.

And so, this post is about my roommate, of course. (more…)

It’s been a week since we got started here at The Banner and we’d like to take a moment to thank everyone who made our first week a success.

Any blog is only as good as the people who read it and comment on it. (more…)

Dear Royle,

You don’t know me, but I have to tell you what I think before I hurt someone. I wouldn’t even know who you are if my mom hadn’t sent me the new church manuals this year like she does every year. She figures if I don’t go to church I might read them anyway and while browsing through the manual about your father I read about your death. (more…)

Following is a short story that I wrote that I’d like to share with the bloggernacle:

She wears a white dress trimmed with lace, and kicks her ball around
the field in circles. Soon, the dinner bell rings, and she runs toward
the large house with the open windows. Just outside the house, she is
stopped by a tall man whom she has never seen before. He is wearing
old overalls and a threadbare shirt. He has big hands with dark, dirty
fingernails. Looking down at her with his worn, knobby face, he
frowns. She freezes, and he picks her up. (more…)

I know I promised to post again on worldly learning, there are several things to clear up. But something Mari said sparked a thought that I feel impressed to share first. Mari spoke of some difficulty with her mother, I have no idea what it is. I’m surprised, how much trouble could a middle-aged woman possibly cause? Middle-aged women seem sweet and harmless to me. But anyway the issue that came up is the difference between forgiveness and trust. We are required to forgive all men. But we don’t have to trust them. And from God, we want God not just to forgive us but to trust us. And in this we come to the great things of eternity.
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Has it come to this? Have the forces of repression and guilt so gripped us that a post like this is even necessary? Is romance on its deathbed. I’m afraid so. (more…)

Idle hands are the devil’s workshop, and no hands are idler than those clutching the joystick of an Xbox or any other game console. (more…)

I recently had to think about this because its what my dad kept asking me over and over again when I called him up to sheepishly ask for a small loan. It’s been an expensive month—had to pay an early termination fee on my lease and a security deposit on my spot in the Oasis, and then some college buddies were meeting up in Vegas over Memorial Day where Luck, like my ex-girlfriend, was not being much of a lady. So when my 1993 Ford Taurus started having troubles with the transmission, I didn’t have the extra six hundred bucks to make sure that I could get to work every day. (more…)

I don’t have much of a job, even though I have a lot of education (if I do say so myself). Sometimes this really bothers me, but most of the time, I am just fine with my lack of a career. Here’s why.
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A close friend of mine since childhood is divorcing her husband, because he cannot stop looking at pornography. Since they were married, I’ve become increasingly good friends with her husband, and so I’ve had a chance to talk to both of them about this in detail. The story, taking into account both sides, is like this: (more…)

I’ll start by admitting I’m extremely uncomfortable with conflict. I will go to great lengths to avoid it, and usually I will work hard to get any feuding parties known to me to make up with each other. I enjoy blogging and reading blogs because it’s relaxing and helps me feel like I’m part of a great community of Saints. But lately in the Bloggernacle, I’ve been so overwhelmed by just how nasty things have become that I can’t even bring myself to comment. (more…)

Some may have gotten a wrong impression from my first post. Namely that I don’t think education has any value. This is not correct. Some commenters pointed out how much President Hinckley talks about education. Which I agree with. But we have to listen carefully to what he says. And place it in an overall eternal perspective. Clearing up this misconseption is the first of several points raised by my commenters that I will dignify with a post. So don’t despair those of you whose deep insiteful comments seemed to go unanswered. I may just be biding my time to address them in a post when I can set aside enough time. (more…)

Now’s your chance to find out everything you always wanted to know about The Banner of Heaven but were afraid to ask. (more…)

The other night I was over at my neighbor Dale’s house listening to him talk about his life again and drinking some more cool-aid. That’s how it usually goes. He talks and I listen. Out of the blue he asked me if I was religious. (more…)

Ever heard of speed dating? I have recently become an expert. Let me tell you, it’s not all it’s cracked up to be, but I discovered the experience to be a great spiritual tool and a way to really gain insights into the gifts of the Spirit (recently pronounced dead elsewhere in the Bloggernacle!).

It all started two weeks ago… (more…)

At baptism, we covenant to bear each other’s burdens, and in the temple we pledge to give our all to help build the kingdom of God. If we follow Christ’s example, there is never too much we can give or do for someone else. Believing all this, is there a way to set healthy limits on service? (more…)

Steven Levitt’s Freakonomics started circulating in my office about a month ago, and last Friday it was finally my turn to read it while everyone else covered phones, coffee, and crises. The fact that it took a whole month to get to me represents its own economic analysis of my relative worth in the office; I’m also the last to know about left-over food from office lunches. And that’s just the point I want to make about Freakonomics: once you read this book, you’ll start wondering if everything in your life can be explained by economics. (more…)

In the last month. (more…)

When I was growing up on the east coast, the label “intellectual” was an insult. It applied to certain people in the ward, luckily only a few, who had decided that they were smarter than the Brethren. (more…)

I kept meaning to comment on Miranda’s post on divorce. But now there’s so many comments I’m afraid the important things I have to say would get overlooked. So why not take advantage of my chance as a blogger here to make a whole post out of it and thereby shake the earth as with the voice of a trump. I know I promised another post on learning. I know the intellectual types, most of you, are anxious to be confounded again by the weak and simple, me. Don’t worry. I’ll get to that other post next week. But now, hearken! I have three points related to Miranda’s post. (more…)

This is the first installment of The Banner Mailbag, a regular feature where Banner readers get to ask us whatever questions you want. (more…)

Not to detract from the recent offensive filth on this blog lately, I’d like to add some thoughts.

In my last post on Speed Dating, I read a lot of comments about mormon men and how they aren’t as romantic or interesting as non-mormons. I want to set the record straight — there are real mormon men that I admire and that I think are interesting, and perhaps romantic. Case in point: Elder Henry B. Eyring. (more…)